Massage is an age-old concept of using your hands to help someone relax their muscles and nerves by applying pressure and performing certain movements. And while the basic massage concept is pretty clear, it has also evolved to have an erotic variation that can be utilized in hetero, gay, BBW, transgender and cougar dating.
But, as you can imagine, giving an erotic massage isn’t easy. It takes some skill, knowledge, and practice before you can perfect the process of being an erotic masseuse for your spouse, which is why we’re here to give you a few tips so that you can start from something.
The first and foremost thing you have to do is set up a stage. Having the proper atmosphere is of crucial importance because you can’t really give a good massage if the surroundings don’t fit the mood properly.
Therefore, you should ensure that your partner has a comfortable place to lay on, that the light isn’t too bright in the room (nor too dimmed) and that there’s no noise around you. You can even go as far as to play some ambiance music and light a few scented candles, as all this augments the enjoyment that massage brings, especially an erotic one.
Tools of the Trade
You’ll be wise to have some massage oil you can use. It’s also good to have some lubricant at hand since we’re talking about an erotic massage here.
Place the oil bottle in a cup of warm water so that you can get your hands warm as quickly as possible. The massage oil is there to make it easier for your hands to move around while also warming up your partner’s body. The lubricant is for, well, whatever comes after.
Small Tricks do the Job
Now let’s talk about those small tricks all masseurs know that can make any massage feel like a walk in the clouds.
You can start things off by lightly touching your partner with dry hands. Use long, gentle strokes all across their body to prepare them for the main course. Once you feel like they’ve relaxed a bit, apply the warm massage oil we’ve mentioned earlier and begin caressing their body while still applying some dose of pressure.
Now for the erotic part. To get the full effect of the erotic massage, keep massaging your partner until you feel they have completely let go of any tension and stress. Once that happens, you can apply some lubricant to your hands and begin targeting some more erogenous zones of their body.
For instance, if you were working on their hands, back and neck in the beginning, now would be the time to focus on their chest, thighs, buttocks, lower back and stomach. As soon as you notice your partner starting to squirm around while you’re dangerously approaching their nether area, you can move on the main course.
This is where things can go in many different directions. Depending on what you and your partner prefer, you can get naked and hop on them or you can keep working on them until they reach climax. Either way, it’s a fun experience that both of you will appreciate.
When you’re into biker dating it’s hard to imagine that anything can stop you from reaching an orgasm! However, since you can’t focus solely on your sex life and have other things you need to take care of, more often than not you can find yourself in a situation where you miss an orgasm. As frustrating as this is, we’d like to draw your attention to a few things that are a sure buzz kill so you can try your best to avoid them whenever possible.
#1: Sitting Too Much at Work
Being glued to your desk chair certainly makes your boss happy, but it also interferes with your body’s ability to have an orgasm. Sitting all day shortens the pelvic muscles, which can lead to pelvic pain, which makes having an orgasm next to impossible. In order to prevent this problem, set an alarm as a reminder to move every half an hour to an hour while at work. Sneak into the kitchen or the conference room and stretch your hip flexors with back bends, squats, and butterfly stretches.
#2: Not Telling Your Partner What You Want
Just like you can’t read his mind, he can’t read yours either. If you stay silent during sex about what really turns you on, the whole thing is likely to end in disappointment. Every person is different and the motions and angles that work for some women don’t work for others. Or, you might be in the mood for one thing but your partner keeps ‘insisting’ on another. In other words, your only option is to speak up! A soft moan or a touch of a hand can make all the difference, and if you can’t tell him directly, there are ways to show him. Just move his hand where you want it, and remember that most men consider it a huge turn-on when a woman is that confident to ‘direct’ them in bed.
#3: You Don’t Make Noise
From the evolutionary perspective, human females make noise during sex as to alert other members of the ‘pack’ not to disturb them, and to encourage their males to make love to them. At the same time, being vocal during sex actually does wonders for women because it makes their pleasure stronger and longer-lasting. So, if you really like what your partner is doing, say it! Embracing these sensations can help you tune out the rest of the world and maximize your pleasure.
#4: Your Medication Might Be Interfering
You know how every medication comes with a list of side effects? Well, read it carefully! In so many instances medication that is prescribed to women either negatively affects their libido or makes natural vaginal lubrication a thing of the past. If your drugs cause an increase in prolactin levels, a libido-inhibiting protein, you might not be able to climax as easily as before. Blood pressure medication, birth control pills, and anti-depressants are the usual suspects. Also, antihistamines interfere with a woman’s ability to self-lubricate, which can make sex uncomfortable.
#5: A Full Bladder Isn’t Helping
We all know that peeing after sex reduces the risk of a urinary tract infection, but it’s often a good idea to go beforehand as well. It can be incredibly hard to have an orgasm when your bladder is full because instead of being in the moment, you’re feeling the pressure to pee. Also, taking a quick pee break mid-sex can kill the mood for both you and your partner, so make sure you make a quick trip to the bathroom before you get busy under the sheets.